Idiots
by PatientNumber10
Summary: ...sometimes Azula thinks that this whole locking-her-away thing is okay... TyZula.


**Disclaimer: **Nope.

**Idiots**

You know, sometimes Azula thinks that this whole locking-her-away thing is okay. Yeah, it was boring but her boredom can easily be swept away when she meditates or when people come in to see if she was still alive, feed her, ask her annoying questions, things like that. And she'd often get amusement out of pissing off everyone that invaded her almost-sanctuary.

The only thing she hates are the grime and the rats and the chains and the straitjacket and the nerve-wracking water drops. They go plop... plop... plop, and so on, in the darkness. Do you even know how that gets on Azula's nerves? Try listening to it for hours, days, months. Sit beside a faucet or something and close your eyes and listen. Just seriously imagining it can drive you crazy.

But those aside, everything is okay.

Yep. Azula is just fine.

The second to best part about being locked up is that she doesn't have to deal with the whole world filled with idiots. Yeah, Azula thinks that she was always surrounded by imbeciles and is quite glad that she doesn't often have to now. Those goodie-goodie Avatar fanatics, her brother, her mother, heck, even her father. Every last one of the insignificant and incompetent population on the earth is an idiot. Which, of course, doesn't include her.

Azula knew she didn't exist in such a world. Especially with her chained in this dingy, suffocating box, being forgotten, being left to rot forever.

But it's fine. Dandy. Excellent. Exponentially perfect.

She isn't lying to herself this time. In a place where she can be alone and be free, okay maybe quarter-free, and be... be herself, she doesn't need to lie. What would that even gain her? More fucked up hallucinations and nightmares? No, thanks. She'd only lie when the idiots come, but that's really a law, right? You know, her being bitchy all the time. That's her. It will never change.

Yeah.

But, you know, the best part about being locked up is that she can have this one certain idiot all on her own, be with the thing in a small, closed room while the rest of the world was outside with no expectations and no idea whatsoever what the two of them were doing.

It was simple, really, with her chained as she was not much movement was involved, just all... mouth. Talk. They talk to each other about things didn't really matter like Do you think that rat is a boy? (I don't know...) How many of your hair would fall off your head if I give you a bath right now? (More than twenty? Keh, why, do you even count yours?) Not really... (And you have the gall to ask me?) Yeah, I know right; how long ago was your last bath anyway?

See? Pointless. But Azula enjoys the senseless rambling. It's so very different from the conversation with the other idiots. No thinking and dodging involved, just plain... talking.

And she does so love to watch the certain idiot's lips move, smile when something pleases her, pout when Azula says something dirty. And her eyes. They were so expressive and most of the time really, really excited like it's the first time she'd ever seen and talked with a chained lunatic. Maybe it was. GASP! Maybe it wasn't. Azula hope it's the latter. She might get jealous and might try escape and hunt down that first lunatic. If she did that she would definitely die, which would be very unpleasant. Who wants to die young anyway?

Azula's certain idiot was hers and hers alone. She is Azula's idiot, and Azula is her lunatic.

Every time she visits Azula would get all, as irritating as the feeling is, fuzzy inside. Although sometimes Azula thinks feeling fuzzy isn't so bad. It's a nice feeling, you know? So unlike when the other idiots come; Azula would just get worked up and then she'll work them up and then they'll get annoyed and start playing God and hose her down to shut her up. It was tedious. It was _routine. _Very tiring.

There are times she would just sleep and play dead through those rough times. Playing dead was better because the idiots would always scramble and panic as though letting her die would get them killed too.

The door groans open, and Azula lolls her head and stills her breath, quickly "dying". She hopes they'll panic again.

"Hey, Azula!" Ty Lee chirps as she skips into the cell.

Azula revives herself. "Hey, little idiot."

Ty Lee pouts cutely and Azula resists the urge to smile.

"You know," Ty Lee says, still pouting, "it's not fair."

"What is?"

"That you call me 'little idiot' all the time."

Azula rolls her eyes. "But aren't you an actual i—"

"Azula!" Ty Lee scolds her but is betrayed immediately by a smile that threatens to infect Azula, too. "You're in a good mood today."

"I am? Don't sit too close, Ty Lee." Azula bumps a sitting Ty Lee as best as she could in a straitjacket.

"Aw..."

"Don't aw me. My bath is still tomorrow; you'll get oily dirt all over yourself!"

Ty Lee covers her mouth to suppress a bubbling laugh and fails. Azula frowns. "I-I'm sorry. Pff...! I-I mean," Ty Lee clears her throat and sobers and says in a semi-serious tone, "tha-thank you for your be-pff-benevolence."

"Will you cut it out!"

"Okay, okay." Ty Lee exhales. She smiles. "You're really sweet, you know that."

"Meh..."

"We'll cuddle up tomorrow after your bath, 'kay?"

"Whatever."

"I'll take that as a yes."

Silence.

"Little idiot," Azula says.

"Ty Lee," Ty Lee corrects.

"Little idiot, do you have another lunatic?"

"Huh?" Ty Lee thinks it over. "No, not that I can recall... Why?"

"Oh, nothing..."

Ty Lee grins. "Don't worry, 'Zula, you're my only sweet and lovable lunatic!"


End file.
